The Poet: #6 "You're Not Doing It Right"
The Poet: Chapter 6- "You're not doing it right." Who else has had people tell them this throughout their life?
This is me, Steve Emig, riding my BMX bike in an abandoned swimming pool known as the Nude Bowl, way out in the Southern California desert, in 1990. I was 24 years old then, had not been to college, and was spending $5,000 of my own money to self-produce my own BMX freestyle video. At that time, individual riders, as a rule, did not make their own videos, only BMX bike companies and magazines did. I was a pioneer in BMX freestyle video production, but I lost a bunch of money producing this video. In the “normal” way of looking at life, I was pretty much doing “everything wrong” with my life. But I’m glad I “took the road less traveled,” looking back now. It really has made all the difference, to reference the well known Robert Frost poem. Video still from The Ultimate Weekend BMX video.
You’re not doing it right
A soul drops down to planet Earth
Takes on a body to learn something of worth
Memories fade, the past goes black
Nine months warm, then birth, a smack
Working class folks, not a family of wealth
No one warns babies of their mom’s mental health
Abuse in the crib, and in the high chair
He learns how to duck, not how to care
It’s a house of tension for about twenty years
Home’s not a place to relax, it’s a place to fear
Good at school, bad at sports
Called names outside, but A’s on reports
They move town to town, no one’s ever sure why
A new room, a new house, run to the woods and cry
He never really belonged, an outsider in groups
Not picked for a team, alone playing hoops
Too shy, depressed, avoided fights
His life’s common theme, “You’re not doing it right.”
Why can’t you join? Why can’t you conform?
Because I see the perils of joining the norm
A drive to read, to understand why
There is so much evil under the one big sky
At ten years old, he questions life itself
Already trying to improve his mental health
Puberty’s worse, and then the teens
Can’t figure out girls or the dating scene
Big dreams, small actions, drinks his first beer
Mom keeps asking him if he’s a queer
Depression, frustration, more anger, more pain
Constantly wondering if he’s insane
It’s not all bad, there are times of peace
Lost in a book, wandering a creek
Failure is his companion, courage always on strike
He finds salvation on a BMX bike
At first just a hobby, then becomes more
An outlet for frustration, a creative score
He jumps, he races, learns tricks, a new sport forms
He meets other outsiders, far beyond the norm
The bike leads to photos, then to writing words down
A place he belongs, no longer a clown
He’s found an island in the crashing seas
He learns writing poems is the cheapest therapy
Issues unravel, unwinds some strife,
He continues to create an unorthodox life
But the cries of the masses continue to unite
“Why can’t you see that you’re not doing it right?”
There’s a grand story playing out, now eight billion strong
Somewhere there are niches, where you and I belong
The Great Story was set in motion by the greatest Artist of all
Where sometimes we rise and sometimes we fall
Beyond human comprehension, complexity we’ll never understand
Life is meant to be LIVED, not watched from the grandstand
We’re not here to conquer, we’re not here to fall
In Earth’s drama, there’s lessons for souls one and all
Creatures of light, of ether, not dust
Get trapped in physical bodies, the great act of trust
Each has a potential, a destiny to seek
A life on planet Earth is not for the meek
Most flock and swarm, and follow the crowd
Some seek to create, live a bit more out loud
The force of the masses creates pressure to conform
Yet intuition keeps luring us far outside the norm
Can you forgive those that do evil? Help the sick?
Can you learn to be yourself? That’s really the trick
Can you help others lift up? Can you endure being down?
Can you create beautiful pictures? Can you make beautiful sounds?
Will you default to greed, jealousy, and hate?
Can you love the unlovable? Give the hungry a plate?
Can you reach down from above, when you live at a height?
Can you hold off telling others, “You’re not doing it right.”
In this life we collect things, love, wealth, maybe fame
Family, friends, houses, it’s part of the game
But we must all face Death, our souls go back home
We leave behind our collections, jewelry, friendships, and poems
On Earth souls learn lessons… Do we hate? Can we love?
Create heaven, here… now… it’s not found up above
-The White Bear
(Steve Emig)
January 2023
The Poet: Chapter 7- My rules for writing poems- coming soon…